Specialty Service
Bullying, Harassment & Discrimination

If you have found yourself as a target of workplace bullying, harassment or discrimination, you are in the right place. 

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Unfortunately, in a world that is becoming less civilized, negative work behaviors are also on the rise. There is significant evidence on the physical, emotional and mental effects that these behavior have on those that find themselves in the crosshairs. If you are experiencing bullying, harassment or discrimination, you know all to well the effects it has had on you.

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I understand where you are as I too have been a target of bullying, harassment and discriminatory behavior. I am intimately aware of the professional, personal and relational affects that these negative behaviors cause. After three decades in my field, I found myself the target of sexual harassment that lead to bullying by other members of the leadership team. (Was I really being ganged up on as an adult!?) I believe for those who joined in that it was a case of join him lest it be you! (Even those who witness the negative behaviors can exhibit the negative effects similar to those incurred by the original target.) I was dumbfounded. Doesn't that happen to other women? I did what we are instructed and encouraged to do as women who have faced this treatment at work. (Me 2, right?) I confronted the perpetrator and instantly felt the ramifications of doing the right thing. I notified a leader whom I felt was safe. I reported to Human Resources and miraculously... nope. No miracles happened. My situation did not improve and, to my dismay, quickly worsened. Although I had done all of the right stuff, it soon became apparent that despite my actions, my job was in jeopardy.  A Performance Improvement Plan was imminent and termination wasn't going to be far behind. I retained an employment lawyer, which saved my employment but didn't protect my reputation or well-being. Thankfully, the help of the attorney gave me time to remove myself from the direct line of the perpetrator, but the effects of being harassed and bullied lingered. 

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This experience prompted me to attend graduate school for Organizational Psychology. I wanted to learn why these behaviors occur and how to solve them. I researched. I surveyed. I wrote an extensive thesis on negative work behaviors and work culture that included a comprehensive plan to support targets and coach perpetrators up, or out. As a consultant, I was astonished that organizations were not motivated to correct work cultures and instead denied the occurrence of bullying, sexual harassment and discrimination under their roof. I decided instead to work with the people that I want to help most, women who have suffered.

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Here is what I learned:

 

• It is NOT your fault. Perpetrators work at the very core of who we are and we often begin to believe that we did something to cause it or, at the very least, didn't do the right things to correct it.  Again, it is NOT your fault. Now is the time to begin the process of self care and healing. Prioritize you!

  

• ​Bullying, sexual harassment and discrimination happen to women of all ages, in all types of work environments and in all types of organizations. No employment sector has a monopoly on destructive behaviors.

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• Human Resources is NOT your friend (actually, I already knew that as organizational psychologists are trained to support employees instead of treating them like a liability.) The primary function of Human Resources is to mitigate problems and protect the organization. Yes, you do have to report to Human Resources to start your report and document your experience. Just don't be fooled. As kind as they seem, Human Resources will protect the organization before caring for the employees. 

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• Beside straight up termination, organizations often use a concept called constructive termination where they make it harder and harder to do your work, micromanage, add duties beyond your capabilities and document your failure.  The mounting stress of being under the microscope often pushes employees to resign, which is the end goal of constructive termination. If you resign, it saves the organization time, money and puts the blame on the employee

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•  Constructive termination is more destructive than overt termination because it involves subtle, insidious changes in the workplace that lead to an employee feeling compelled to resign, rather than a clear and direct dismissal. This  type of termination can result in prolonged emotional distress and uncertainty for the employee, as they may grapple with feelings of betrayal or disillusionment from employment gaslighting without the closure that can come from a straightforward termination. Women begin to question their reality. Additionally, constructive termination can create a toxic work environment, impacting not just the individual employee but also their colleagues. The lack of a formal termination process may also complicate legal recourse for the affected employee. This means that if you resign, you may not be able to take any legal action.

 

•  This is where the Performance Improvement Plan (PIP) comes in. A  Performance Improvement Plan  is intended to make your work life difficult to impossible. Although it is provided on the guise of support, development and growth, the PIP is usually a vague document of shortcomings that they have assigned to you and a plan for you to perform to their expectation. The catch is, it is not intended that you improve. Your failures, no matter how inaccurate, will be documented and used to support your termination within the PIP term, which is usually six to twelve months.  In addition to outright termination, a PIP is often the most effective tool used in construction termination. 

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• The legal system for sexual harassment and discrimination is daunting, lengthy and expensive. (Bullying is yet to be covered legally in any of the 50 states at this time.) Even with immaculate documentation of sexual harassment and discrimination, the best that may happen is that you escape with your dignity and integrity, though they may be bruised an battered.

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• The legal system is not well designed to protect women against sexual harassment and discrimination. The system makes it much easier for the organization than it does for women. Yes, even in the 2020's it is professionally acceptable to target women with sexual harassment and discrimination. 

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• Many women find that even with evidence, documentation and witnesses, they may not be able to retain a lawyer. Women may speak to several firms and begin to question their experience. Not being able to retain an attorney isn't because they don't believe you. It may be because the hill to climb to obtain a positive outcome for you is far too steep. Again, legal favor is with the organization. 

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So now what? 

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1. You do whatever you need to do to protect your employment, your professional reputation and regain your mental, emotional and physical well-being. Take care of you!​​

2. Document, document, document. This step is as important as it is time consuming. Document dates, times, conversations, performance meetings, off record discussions, leadership and Human Resource contact and any witnesses to the behavior. Additionally,  forward all electronic communications and texts to an offsite email. Once you are no longer employed, all of that information is lost to you and much harder to obtain. ​​

3. Contact an employment law firm that has experience with sexual harassment and discrimination. Most law firms will consult with you at no charge to determine if your case is legally defensible. Remember, if attorneys do not accept your case, it is because they do not believe that the legal system will be in your favor. It is not because what happened to you isn't important. It's the plight of the legal system.​

4. Regardless of your legal standing, you will need to prioritize the care of yourself and work toward recovery from this experience.  It's never easy and having the right support is paramount to your healing. ​ Surround yourself with people who love, care for and support you.​

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Let me become part of your support system!

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I have developed a comprehensive 12 week program designed for women like you to heal, regain self esteem, confidence and strength, and to give you the survival skills that will not only support you through this difficult time, but also give you armor against the next perpetrator hiding around the corner!